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Global warming: Hey, what’s this ice doing here?

I am not a scientist. I admit that without regret. I also don’t know Jack about the science of climate change.

But because I’m a fully functioning human being with opposable thumbs and some cognitive reasoning skills, I’m skeptical of those selling the idea of man-caused global warming, especially those who stand to gain from the fix.

But like I say, I’m not a scientist. Take it for what it is worth.

I am, however, a writer. And I do know irony.

C.S. Lewis once said he believed in Christianity because, among other reasons, “reality, in fact, is usually something you could not have guessed.”

Well, guess what happened to a ship full of global warming alarmists on a holiday expedition to measure the ice melt in Antarctica?

Their ship got stuck in a massive 10-foot-deep sea of ice.

Two features of this story merit a closer look.

One, of course, is the hilarity of getting stuck in the stuff you claim is disappearing. The other underlines the proclivity of modern journalists to adopt a popular news narrative without much skeptical thinking.

Here are the c-c-cold facts.

Chris Turney, a professor of climate change at the University of New South Wales in Australia, teaches man-caused global warming. He believes we can use “the past to better understand the changes we are seeing today.” So he organized “the opportunity of a lifetime.”

Fellow alarmists could join him and his “research” team on the Russian ship Akademik Shokalskiy for a holiday expedition retracing the steps of Australian explorer Sir Douglas Mawson.

They’d take new scientific readings and compare them to data collected by Mawson in 1912, using equipment developed by the professor. The endeavor was called “The Spirit of Mawson.” People could come along for the ride for as little as $8,000.

But wait, there’s more.

Calling the trip “The Spirit of Mawson” may have tempted karma. History buffs know that the Mawson expedition ended in disaster. It inspired the book “Alone on the Ice: The Greatest Survival Story in the History of Exploration.”

If you’ve ever wondered what it would be like to spend a couple of years in a tent in Antarctica watching men go mad, or why you should never eat the liver of a Husky, this is the book for you.

Anyway, like real-life Gilligans (and the captain, too), the professor and his Mary Anns set out from New Zealand on Nov. 27. On Christmas Eve, the good ship Shokalskiy and her 74 passengers became trapped in ice. She remained stuck until Jan. 7, her global warming groupies air-lifted to safety days before.

How did the media skim over the crazy irony in this story? Initially, the “news” came in the form of a ship in distress, with the press simply describing the voyage as an expedition to commemorate the 100th anniversary of the Mawson expedition.

That totally missed the point. This wasn’t just any voyage. The whole idea behind the trip was to chronicle how incredibly fast wicked man-made global warming melts the ice. The fact that the ship got stuck in ice might not mean a thing when it comes to the bigger scientific questions surrounding climate change.

But the fact that journalists see this story exclusively as a tragedy, and not a farce involving alarmist professors who teach classes (and sell cruises) in the cottage industry called global warming “science,” indicates how pervasive the narrative exists within the notebooks of today’s pack reporters.

Oh, and one more teeny-weeny item on this irony thing.

While the professor and his holiday warmists were wedged in the ice, the scientists at the British Antarctic Survey issued a study that said “suddenly” the ice melt in Antarctica has slowed.

C’mon, folks. That’s funny.

Sherman Frederick, former publisher of the Las Vegas Review-Journal and member of the Nevada Newspaper Hall of Fame, writes a column for Stephens Media. Read his blog at www.reviewjournal.com/columns-blogs/sherman-frederick

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